Post by judyb on Jul 16, 2011 7:34:05 GMT -5
Around the 3-4-5 point mark I got "tired of quitting."
Darn it! it shouldn't be an effort anymore, when am I going to stop feeling
this way! etc. I quit months ago, when is it OVER?!!
I always thought that using the word "Quit" was a
bad choice - but I'm not sure I know of a better one. "Quit" is not a process and
giving up smoking is. Quit is something you do, it's an exclamation point, there
is no followup, it's done, end of story.
Giving up smoking is more like getting a divorce. In the beginning you
hate the other party's guts, it hurts and the hurting reminds
you of how bad it was. But then as time goes by the pain fades and the other
party is still there and you begin to romanticize your time together. Maybe
there's other things that tie you together still. Then you see them around from time
to time, maybe think about the good times and think about how you could maybe get
back together and work things out.
BULL! Actually what's happening is your ex (Nic) is stalking you.
Harassing you everywhere you go. He's interfering with your
sleep. With your other relationships.
You begin to think that, well, maybe you can get
back together and it'll be different this time.
It doesn't work in relationships, and it doesn't work
with smoking either. Nic wants your life, he'll kill you if he gets the chance.
He was an abusive partner and just can't wait for the chance to get his hands on you
again.
The only way out is to stand strong and DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO
DO to keep out of his reach. Eventually you'll think about Nic
less and he'll begin to fade from your memory.
In the meantime you have to build a new life without Nic. Develop hobbies
and go places where Nic isn't welcome. Do deep breathing
exercises and learn some relaxation techniques, etc. Then when you look
around you'll see places and things where you don't have memories of Nic. Or, you have
memories of places where you stood strong against him.
Each day that passes leaves Nic further and further behind in the dust. All
you have to do is get from here to tomorrow.
Darn it! it shouldn't be an effort anymore, when am I going to stop feeling
this way! etc. I quit months ago, when is it OVER?!!
I always thought that using the word "Quit" was a
bad choice - but I'm not sure I know of a better one. "Quit" is not a process and
giving up smoking is. Quit is something you do, it's an exclamation point, there
is no followup, it's done, end of story.
Giving up smoking is more like getting a divorce. In the beginning you
hate the other party's guts, it hurts and the hurting reminds
you of how bad it was. But then as time goes by the pain fades and the other
party is still there and you begin to romanticize your time together. Maybe
there's other things that tie you together still. Then you see them around from time
to time, maybe think about the good times and think about how you could maybe get
back together and work things out.
BULL! Actually what's happening is your ex (Nic) is stalking you.
Harassing you everywhere you go. He's interfering with your
sleep. With your other relationships.
You begin to think that, well, maybe you can get
back together and it'll be different this time.
It doesn't work in relationships, and it doesn't work
with smoking either. Nic wants your life, he'll kill you if he gets the chance.
He was an abusive partner and just can't wait for the chance to get his hands on you
again.
The only way out is to stand strong and DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO
DO to keep out of his reach. Eventually you'll think about Nic
less and he'll begin to fade from your memory.
In the meantime you have to build a new life without Nic. Develop hobbies
and go places where Nic isn't welcome. Do deep breathing
exercises and learn some relaxation techniques, etc. Then when you look
around you'll see places and things where you don't have memories of Nic. Or, you have
memories of places where you stood strong against him.
Each day that passes leaves Nic further and further behind in the dust. All
you have to do is get from here to tomorrow.