Post by judyb on Jun 15, 2004 11:07:32 GMT -5
A time comes in your life when you finally get it..when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you
stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough
fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your
sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and begin to look at the
world through new eyes.
This is your awakening. You realize it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change...or for
happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact
that neither of you is Prince Charming or Cinderella and that in the real world there aren't always fairy
tale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with
you...and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.
You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or
approve of who or what you are, and that's OK. They are entitled to their own views and opinions. And
you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself...and in the process a sense of new found
confidence is born of self-approval. You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they
did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the
unexpected. You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not
everyone will always be there for you and that it's not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your
own and to take care of yourself...and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of
self-reliance. You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to
overlook their shortcomings and human frailities and in the process a sense of peace and contentment is
born of forgiveness. You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you, is a
result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche.
And you begin to sift through all the junk you've been fed about how you should behave, how you
should look, how much you should weigh, what you should wear, what you should do for a living, how
much money you should make, what you should drive, how and where you should live, who you should
marry, the importance of having and raising children, and what you owe your parents, family, and
friends. You lean to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and
redefining who you are and what you really stand for.
You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and
values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with, and in the process you learn to
go with your instincts. You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that there is power and
glory in creating and contributing and you stop manoeuvring through life merely as a "consumer" looking
for your next fix.
You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era but
the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life. You learn that you don't
know everything, it's not your job to save the world and that you can't teach a pig to sing. You learn to
distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say
NO.
You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the
stake. Then you learn about love. How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when
to walk away. You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be.
You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. And you learn that alone does not mean
lonely. You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring
your needs. You learn that feelings of entitlement are prefectly OK...and that it is your right to want
things and to ask for things you want, and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands.
You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity and respect
and you won't settle for less. And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin to care
for it and treat it with respect. You begin to eat a balanced diet, drink more water, and take more time
to exercise. You learn that being tired fuels doubt, fear, and uncertainty and so you take more time to
rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul.
So take more time to laugh and to play. You learn that, for the most part, you get in life what you
believe you deserve, and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You learn that anything worth
achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen is different than working
toward making it happen.
More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, dicipline and
perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone, and that it's OK to risk asking for help.
You learn the only thing you must truly fear is the greatest robber baron of all: FEAR itself. You learn to
stip right into and through your fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to
give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your own terms. And you learn to fight for your lie
and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom.
You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes
bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to personalize
things. You lean that God isn't punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It's just life happening.
And you learn to deal with evil in ths most primal state, the ego.
You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected
or they will suffocate on the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to
admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls. You learn to be thankful and to take
comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth
can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower.
Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to
never betray yourself and to never, ever settle for less than your heart's desire. And you hand a wind
chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to
keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.
Finally, with courage in your heart and God by your side you take a stand, you take a deep breath, and
you begin to design the life you want to live as best you can.
~Author Unknown~
(I'm still a work in progress, I'm still learning)