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Post by Dot on Mar 27, 2008 9:20:30 GMT -5
Your message in roll call has me thinking....hmmmm. In case you don't remember me from the past, I was here for over two years, back in the dark ages. Unfortunately, I lost my quit. But when I decided to quit again, 5 months ago, this was the first place I turned to. Of course I was welcomed back by the old timers who are still here, (bless their hearts!  ) But since I've been checking in here again, I've seen sooooo many new people sign up, post a time or two, and then theyre gone. I've made it a point to welcome them, and have even kept up with a couple on messenger. But the feeling I get is that there's just not much support here. Maybe the old ones just don't remember how rough the beginning was. Or have forgottong to ask the right questions. I never see much applause for a week or a month or whatever. Those first few months we have a real need to post and talk and whine and laugh, whether smoke related (and what isn't?) or not. That is sadly lacking now, compared to way back when. just my humble opinion. Dot |
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Post by Bubb on Mar 27, 2008 14:42:44 GMT -5
Of course I remember you Dot…it would be shame on me to not remember.
I agree that newbies seem to appear, introduce themselves, and then poof, they’re gone. And I’m not sure why they leave either because it isn't as though they're not welcomed. Good grief, where do they go? Perhaps in prior years we enjoyed a great mix of personalities that kept this place alive. For whatever reasons, there certainly seemed to be a steady supply of new quitters.
But I haven’t forgotten how hard it is to quit. I can recall quite vividly how difficult life was. Learning to live again without smoking is no small undertaking; particularly for a hard core smoker. But when the ‘positive changes’ begin to evolve, that’s when the real world comes back into view. I enjoy reading Flo’s posts…watching her gain momentum and getting stronger each day. That’s the type of participation needed to keep ones self and others interested and motivated. I know you can remember too that from time to time some of us would hang some laundry to get a little feed back regarding things going on in our lives….we didn’t seem to be short of topics to cover. Most of our conversation had a connection to smoking but not always. The camaraderie was grand. Perhaps we’ll see those days again. In the mean time, regardless as to how long we’ve gone without smoking, we still must take one day at a time.
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Post by countryblocks on Mar 27, 2008 18:59:57 GMT -5
I'm glad to see you here Dot and Bubb and also Don Flo and Ann.Hope you ole timers never leave. I too have seen newbies check in and never come back.They need to give this board a chance. I check everyday
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Post by Kathleen on Mar 27, 2008 23:03:56 GMT -5
Hey Bubb! We "old" quitters are still out here...and quit! When I first found the 'just4u board' in 1999, I found people willing to talk about depression, urges, cravings, means to say "stop" to the urges, philosophical discussions of the quitting process, wit, daily diversions, access to a Quitmeter to which I was 'addicted" in a healthy way in the early days of my quit. I literally would sit at my computer and watch the seconds tick by of my non-smoking status and the money I was saving by being a non-smoker. SO many on the board at that time interacted with such candor and authenticity I was kept on track in my quit by them. JudyB, Sagitelle, Robyn, Ann, Christie, Paula, JP, Jamava, and so many others have had a lasting impact on my life... I have no answers for re-invigorating this board...I only know that, in its early format it saved me from the nicobeast! Kathleen "On my way to a smoke-free Y2k!" (my original sig. Does anyone even think about good ol' Y2K anymore?  ) |
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Post by Dot on Mar 28, 2008 7:35:59 GMT -5
Guess we can't go home again, Kathleen. (Gee, that sounds like a song spoof! ;D)
All of those people have a special place in my heart too. I can still remember some of the episodes here with a smile.
I'm sure most people just move on, and I hope someday I can do the same, and just not think of smoking or quitting anymore. But I really was amazed that this place had literally died...I thought there would always be some new blood coming along. There are so many quitter's boards online now tho, many that are much more lively, or much more intimate, than this one. I never cared for Quitnet myself....just too many people and so hard to navigate. But immediate help when needed!
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Post by Karyn on Mar 28, 2008 11:09:30 GMT -5
That is very sad to hear. This board saved me really, on my last quit. I hope that the same support is here again. I also hope that the newbies (like myself again) will stay on and get the teriffic support that all of you have to give on here.
Karyn
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Post by Bubb on Mar 28, 2008 14:07:07 GMT -5
Coincidently….and a little background…
Shortly after I gave up cigarettes, I thought it might be helpful to fill in some of the void by pursuing an old interest…….so I decided to begin taking guitar lessons. When I was much younger I dabbled with the guitar but never sought formal instruction. So I’ve been taking lessons from this fellow for the past 8 ½ years. Well guess who decided to ‘kick the habit’? My guitar teacher.
We get together at a music shop on Thursday evenings for a formal half hour lesson and usually get together along with another fellow in his ‘studio’ on Friday nights. We just kick back and play a little. The studio is a converted garage with lots of gear (some of it works and some of it doesn’t). It isn’t a professional studio but it’s comfortable and has lots of atmosphere. He refers to it as ‘The Dream’. You see, my guitar teacher is a burned out musician who has made music his life but never hit the big time. He’s barely been able to scratch out a living but he keeps trying. He has lived in Los Angeles and Nashville while trying to ‘make it’, but the fame and fortune has somehow eluded him. It’s a shame because the guy can really play. His only claim to fame was being on ‘The Gong Show’. If you’re younger than 50, you may never have heard of the show….but that’s okay.
Anyhow, one must understand he is no kid (a bit younger than me)….(so that makes me no kid either). He’s 53 years old with a ton of miles. He drinks too much and smokes too much and has been doing so for a very long time. Like most of us, he has tried to quit on many occasions. Last night he said he had only 4 cigarettes during the day. And I must say, he was an absolute mess. His hands were shaking so violently that he was barely able to scribble some notation we’re working on. I suggested that he try to obtain a quit aid and something to calm him down a bit. He said he was taking Chantix.
We have all had our own experiences with the smoking habit. But I must say, this poor fellow has a tough road ahead of him. Padding the walls of ‘The Dream’ may be a good idea.....and I wish him well.
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Post by Dot on Mar 28, 2008 17:38:54 GMT -5
Bring him on board, Bubb.
Dot
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Post by slim on Mar 31, 2008 8:23:48 GMT -5
Bubb and Kathleen, Dot and Karyn Love you guys!  Here was a post i saved from Kathleen when i quit....i appreciated it very much. What you say still holds true for new quitters today. Kathleen Joined: May 27, 2001 Posts: 166 From: Iowa. Freed on: 1/1/99 Posted: 2001-06-18 22:36 I want to welcome you determined new quitters too! Online support was a totally new idea to me when I showed up here 2 1/2 years ago. I'm 55 and smoked for over 30 years with uncountable quits and relapses. I lurked here for a couple weeks before finding enough courage to actually post. And am I ever glad I did. Here were people who knew what it felt like too...every strange feeling I had ever had in past quits were 'normalized' here! The weepies; the irritability with spouse, store clerks, traffic, inanimate objects; the loud explosive laughter; being an oxy-moron (slow thought processes and confusion due to increased oxygen to the brain); the consumption of lemon drops, suckers, jolly ranchers, gum, Goodn'Plenty's, pickles, beef jerky, and much much more; sleeplessness and sleeping all the time; hyperactivity and/or inertness... ALL NORMAL!! Being able to stay in touch on a daily basis with support was so important. Kept me focused on the goal. And support here continues long after the rest of the world tires of or takes for granted what you are doing. We KNOW each day is a triumph! My $.02. Come here often...say whatever you want. Complain, get angry, say funny stuff, stream out your consciousness. Give support to others, nothing helps you keep your commitment to your own quit quite as much as encouraging others to do so. Don't let an urge or craving spend any length of time in your head. As soon as one appears, replace it with any other thoughts...alphabet, read the road signs out loud if you're driving, repeat the multiplication tables, sing as loud as you can. The less time you give the urge mentally the more you are repatterning your brain. In fact, don't even call them cravings or urges...gives them too much power. Try to imagine them as smokingthoughts...just a thought like any other, don't need to act on them. Slowly, slowly they will lose their power over you! Be patient with yourselves. I don't know how long you smoked, but you conditioned yourselves to a nicotine hit hundreds of times a day. Be confident and determined you CAN beat this, but don't be misled into thinking all the challenges end after Hell week...some one else has said that Heck week follows! And lastly, be absolutely committed to staying quit NO MATTER WHAT. Period. Remember that you have made a totally SANE decision, especially when the nicobeast tries to seduce you back. And believe me, IT DOES GET BETTER! Kathy Two years, five months, two weeks, three days, 21 hours, 36 minutes and 17 seconds. 26997 cigarettes not smoked, saving $3,509.45. Life saved: 13 weeks, 2 days, 17 hours, 45 minutes. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Beleive it or not I forgot to say something: that I quit cold turkey too. It is do-able. I did use lemon drops, Goodn'Plenty's, and chawing on a cinnamon stick as aids. I can't recommend this as healthy or 'slimming', but it worked for me. And at a point where my quitter's depression wasn't going away I got the med I needed. In the past this would happen to me also and I always went back to the smokes because my emotions became so messy. But with my 'NO MATTER WHAT' decision this time, I found a much better way to deal with that aspect. And yes, prayer helps too! In fact, you might try a prayer to replace any and all smokingthoughts that come to pester you. Best wishes. Kathy |
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Post by Karyn on Mar 31, 2008 11:04:50 GMT -5
Slim, love love that post.
Holy cow I totally forgot about the depression part, I think I chanelled into shopping which was really bad, but I did start working out, but was a completely different person, and not all for the better, so I need to prepare myself, and that post just did help.
Karyn
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