Post by Ann on Feb 5, 2009 8:58:52 GMT -5
I'm Living what everyone here fears.
Not looking for any advice or sympathy but thought my story might keep a few of you on the right path.
I was a closet smoker for 25 years. I never smoked all that much, less than a pack a day, and I stayed fit and worked out almost everyday. I quit several times, once for almost two years but always seemed to start again. The old one is too many and 1000 aren't enough.
Well I quit again last August 18th. The day I had a biopsy done on a mass in my left lung. Two days later I found out I had extended small cell lung cancer which had spread to my liver and lymph nodes. I've been in treatment since and its been pretty brutal. Dr. told me the fact the I was 'so healthy' has really worked in my favor because I can tolerate so much treatment at once. He also told me my lungs didn't look like those of a smoker (when he did the broncial scope for the biopsy). I was one of those that always rationalized that smoking was my one vice and I didn't smoke that much and would eventually quit.
I'm 48 years old (only 3% of the people diagnosed with my type of cancer are under 50...lucky me). I was widowed in 1993 and have two daughters (18 and 21) that I have raised primarily alone even though I re-married several years ago. They now face losing me which is the hardest thing for me to not blame myself for. They deserve better. So much better.
I just found out last week that my cancer has spread to my brain. I started a new round of radiation to my head monday. I don't really know what is next.
I still work everyday but its about all I can do. One flight of stairs wears me out. It really stinks but I am hopeful that I can beat this thing. Odds aren't in my favor. Not even close.
Please don't wait to quit. I know how tough it is believe me. But also believ me, what I am going through is a lot worse.
God Bless you aal.
Mark
found on Quitnet 01/08/09
Not looking for any advice or sympathy but thought my story might keep a few of you on the right path.
I was a closet smoker for 25 years. I never smoked all that much, less than a pack a day, and I stayed fit and worked out almost everyday. I quit several times, once for almost two years but always seemed to start again. The old one is too many and 1000 aren't enough.
Well I quit again last August 18th. The day I had a biopsy done on a mass in my left lung. Two days later I found out I had extended small cell lung cancer which had spread to my liver and lymph nodes. I've been in treatment since and its been pretty brutal. Dr. told me the fact the I was 'so healthy' has really worked in my favor because I can tolerate so much treatment at once. He also told me my lungs didn't look like those of a smoker (when he did the broncial scope for the biopsy). I was one of those that always rationalized that smoking was my one vice and I didn't smoke that much and would eventually quit.
I'm 48 years old (only 3% of the people diagnosed with my type of cancer are under 50...lucky me). I was widowed in 1993 and have two daughters (18 and 21) that I have raised primarily alone even though I re-married several years ago. They now face losing me which is the hardest thing for me to not blame myself for. They deserve better. So much better.
I just found out last week that my cancer has spread to my brain. I started a new round of radiation to my head monday. I don't really know what is next.
I still work everyday but its about all I can do. One flight of stairs wears me out. It really stinks but I am hopeful that I can beat this thing. Odds aren't in my favor. Not even close.
Please don't wait to quit. I know how tough it is believe me. But also believ me, what I am going through is a lot worse.
God Bless you aal.
Mark
found on Quitnet 01/08/09
