Post by Ann on Feb 12, 2009 9:13:16 GMT -5
Repost: I Remain Afraid!
From Knight_Cyberian on 10/9/2008 4:52:25 AM
I Remain Afraid!
Hi Friends,
A journey in real life through tough obstacles is really exciting. The heady feeling that one has after successfully conquering obstacles, fills one with daring and determination to attempt more obstacles on the way. Small successes therefore reinforces self-belief and makes one stronger and bolder. The goal seems not too far off and the confidence level rises.
Stories of failures, that are more commonplace are brushed aside with an arrogance, with the typical belief that the mistakes that caused those failures around oneself, will not be repeated by him. Here is where however, I have reasons to believe, lies a hidden obstacle of great difficulty, and which must therefore be negotiated very carefully.
There is a strange uneasiness about a continued success as compared to a failure. A failure makes one investigate and then come up with future strategy to avoid the same pitfalls before embarking on a journey again. A continued success however often makes one wonder, 'where is the catch'? Specially since success validates each and every one of the past actions!
For, was the success not the aggregate of each of those actions? A moment's thought would show that this cannot be true. One cannot have been doing all the correct things all the time! So then, what were the mistakes committed by one who was successful? How does one successful quitter, avoid the mistakes or pitfalls that might threaten his quit?
Indeed, can he ever hope to know that himself? Ofcourse, its easy to add that, the very steps that one took, to achive his success so far, ought to sustain him in the future too. The same consistent application of those very principles should ensure continued success. Very correct! Yet, somehow, there is always this gnawing thought at the back of one's mind, 'is that all' ?
OK Friends, the odds of making this journey to the one year mark and beyond were very heavyily stacked against me. As I took one hesitating step after another, one bumbling step after the next, afraid of myself and scared of everyone, nervous and irritable, dramatic and exaggerating, the odds though, must have kept changing in my favour, slowly but very surely.
For now, I have crossed that smoke-free year mark, which I once read somewhere was achived by only a five percent of all quitters who quit smoking on a given date! Ofcourse, I had the entire Q behind me and a majority of the most beautiful hearts full of love and friendship, that one can find here or anywhere. Yet, I remain afraid always, my friends.
Its just like the scary feeling that I get when I sit behind the wheels of my car, out on a couple of hundred miles of rough country roads or ill maintained highways and praying that I may be able to arrive at my destination safely, despite having logged previously many a thousand miles on those roads of death and disabilities. The result is: I drive safely
This post is addressed to none in particular. Ofcourse, should any one of you, my friends, do find something in this to be wary and cautious of, and have started examining yourself despite your successes, I will encourage you happily, for the demon of our addiction NEVER DIES! It also goes for those who have doubts despite a rocking quit. Its actually empowering!
I find myself reserves of strength in me when I remain afraid ...
found on Quitnet
From Knight_Cyberian on 10/9/2008 4:52:25 AM
I Remain Afraid!
Hi Friends,
A journey in real life through tough obstacles is really exciting. The heady feeling that one has after successfully conquering obstacles, fills one with daring and determination to attempt more obstacles on the way. Small successes therefore reinforces self-belief and makes one stronger and bolder. The goal seems not too far off and the confidence level rises.
Stories of failures, that are more commonplace are brushed aside with an arrogance, with the typical belief that the mistakes that caused those failures around oneself, will not be repeated by him. Here is where however, I have reasons to believe, lies a hidden obstacle of great difficulty, and which must therefore be negotiated very carefully.
There is a strange uneasiness about a continued success as compared to a failure. A failure makes one investigate and then come up with future strategy to avoid the same pitfalls before embarking on a journey again. A continued success however often makes one wonder, 'where is the catch'? Specially since success validates each and every one of the past actions!
For, was the success not the aggregate of each of those actions? A moment's thought would show that this cannot be true. One cannot have been doing all the correct things all the time! So then, what were the mistakes committed by one who was successful? How does one successful quitter, avoid the mistakes or pitfalls that might threaten his quit?
Indeed, can he ever hope to know that himself? Ofcourse, its easy to add that, the very steps that one took, to achive his success so far, ought to sustain him in the future too. The same consistent application of those very principles should ensure continued success. Very correct! Yet, somehow, there is always this gnawing thought at the back of one's mind, 'is that all' ?
OK Friends, the odds of making this journey to the one year mark and beyond were very heavyily stacked against me. As I took one hesitating step after another, one bumbling step after the next, afraid of myself and scared of everyone, nervous and irritable, dramatic and exaggerating, the odds though, must have kept changing in my favour, slowly but very surely.
For now, I have crossed that smoke-free year mark, which I once read somewhere was achived by only a five percent of all quitters who quit smoking on a given date! Ofcourse, I had the entire Q behind me and a majority of the most beautiful hearts full of love and friendship, that one can find here or anywhere. Yet, I remain afraid always, my friends.
Its just like the scary feeling that I get when I sit behind the wheels of my car, out on a couple of hundred miles of rough country roads or ill maintained highways and praying that I may be able to arrive at my destination safely, despite having logged previously many a thousand miles on those roads of death and disabilities. The result is: I drive safely
This post is addressed to none in particular. Ofcourse, should any one of you, my friends, do find something in this to be wary and cautious of, and have started examining yourself despite your successes, I will encourage you happily, for the demon of our addiction NEVER DIES! It also goes for those who have doubts despite a rocking quit. Its actually empowering!
I find myself reserves of strength in me when I remain afraid ...
found on Quitnet