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Post by judyb on Aug 31, 2004 11:47:56 GMT -5
Nothing wrong with enjoying 2nd hand smoke.....just DON'T ever think that one puff can't hurt......it can! You're doing great!!! Be proud!
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Post by judyb on Aug 31, 2004 11:47:56 GMT -5
Nothing wrong with enjoying 2nd hand smoke.....just DON'T ever think that one puff can't hurt......it can! You're doing great!!! Be proud!
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Post by judyb on Aug 26, 2004 11:03:46 GMT -5
From my extremely thick quit file, some great advice: In July of 1996, my father passed away and left me staring straight into the face of my own mortality. You see, he smoked a pack to 2 packs a day for 55 years. About five years before his death, he quit. At that point his weakened blood vessels had caused two annurisms, the second of which left him paralyzed. His second heart attack was the one that killed him. Dad was a very healthy guy otherwise. He exercised regularly and was always in great shape.
I'm not. I smoked 2-3 packs a day for 20 years. I began to think about missing my daughter's graduation and wedding. I realized I could barely breath by the time I had walked to my office from the car. Many of you know what I'm talking about. You have to stop and catch your breath when you get in the door. I was convinced I wouldn't live to see 50.
In December, I decided I was going to quit. I set a stop day. January 3rd of 1997. I didn't want to stop on New Years Eve because I know how tempting it is to smoke at the big party. I've tried that before and it never worked.
I got the gum, because I had heard about being able to measure your dose by chewing. I had also heard about the psycological advantage of tearing up your last pack of cigarettes and flushing them down the toilet.
At 3:00 am on January 3rd, I smoked my last cigarette. I stood over the toilet and tore up a little better than a pack of cigarettes. I didn't just tear them up, I attacked them. I blamed them for everything wrong in my life and I took those feelings out on that pack of cigarettes and watched them swirl down the basin when I flushed them away. It was like I was flushing away the problems in my life. (I wasn't of course, my problems still exist but it made me feel really good about what I was doing)
Afterward I sat down and cried for a few minutes and then I went to bed.
The next morning I woke up and immediately thought of my cigarettes. I grabbed my gum and started chewing. That first day was tough. The second was worse. No one I knew believed I could quit but they were all very supportive of my attempt. My wife got rid of all the ashtrays, lighters, matches and other smoking material in the house.
By day 4, I couldn't stand the gum anymore. My jaws were tired from chewing all the time. It really does taste terrible. I switched to regular Wrigley's gum. That lasted about 3 days. Finally I gave up the gum altogether and went cold turkey. Let me tell you, those first 10 days sucked. They were the worst experience of my life. I wanted a cigarette all the time. There was never a moment when I didn't want one. Then things gradually started getting better. This NG helped me a lot. I would sit and read the posts and cry. I felt all the same things you people are feeling. I didn't post. I just needed to know that other people went through the same things I did and made it. I needed their suggestions for getting through tough times. It helped a great deal.
Some of the worst things about quiting: 1 The first 10 days are pure hell. (but it gets better) 2 After about 3 months the little hairs in your throat start growing back and it itches. You cough as bad or worse than you did when you smoked. It makes you feel like "if I'm gonna cough this bad I might as well smoke." (But it goes away.) 3 When you've been working with your hands, where you can't smoke. You complete the job and you reach for a cigarette. You don't realize it but you feel that cigarette is like a reward. When its not there, you're VERY disappointed. Its depressing. (But that goes away too.) 4 You really wonder when the day will come when you will go a whole day without thinking of having a cigarette. (For me it was some time during my second year.) 5 You still want one every once in a while, no matter how long its been. The cravings just come further and further apart.
I mention all this not to frighten you but so that you can prepare yourself for it.
As time went by, I realized why the non-smokers are so offended.
The first thing I noticed was that people who smoke stink. I mean really, we smell. As my sense of smell returned, I would have people walk into my office who smoked and I could tell the minute they walked in the door. The odor of the smoke permeates their clothes and body. That helped. Then I started to be bothered by smoke when I was eating. Not at first. In fact it was several months. But now it bothers me. Not terribly. I decided I would not become one of these fanatical anti-smokers when I quit and I haven't. I no longer allow it in my house or car because I don't like the smell. But I don't mind sitting with people who smoke in a meeting, or being in a smoke filled bar. In fact, during the first few weeks of my quit, I would hang around smokers because the second hand smoke would seem to satisfy my cravings.
That was one of the things that surprised me. It has never bothered me to drink around people who smoke. It never made me crave a cigarette (even the first time on day 4) and it has never bothered me to have a beer with a smoker.
To sum it up though it has definitely been worth while. I can breath again, my blood pressure is way down, I don't cough all the time, I can walk to the office from my car without gasping and I think I'm gonna live another twenty years at least. (I still need to lose some weight and I smoked a long time but I'm getting better.) I'm happier. People don't avoid me at parties or make me stand outside their house to smoke. I got a promotion I don't know if I would have gotten if I still smoked. And most of all, the people who never thought I would quit, gained a tremendous amoumt of respect for me. Especially, the smokers who know how tough it is.
To give a new quitter some advice, here's what helped me. It won't necessarily work for everyone.
1 You can't quit for anybody but yourself. If you're quitting for your wife or your girlfriend or whomever, forget it. Nicorette and Nicoderm are expensive. Save yourself some money and quit when YOU'RE ready. It doesn't work unless you really want to quit.
2 Get some support. Use this NG. Get your wife and coworkers to help. Call a friend who has quit. Talk to somebody.
3 Make yourself a quit list. Write down every reason you have for stopping. It helps to run through them once in a while.
4 Don't smoke your last cigarette. Tear them up and flush them. It's a tremendous psycological advantage.
5 If you're really tempted to the point of giving in, go sit with some folks who smoke. Breath the second hand smoke. Enjoy it. BUT DON'T PUT ONE IN YOUR MOUTH.
6 This one is the most important. You have to realize that you have an addiction to nicotine that lasts a lifetime. An alcoholic doesn't stop being an alcoholic when he's not drinking. A heroin user can't have "an occassional fix." When you flush that last cigarette, you must realize that when you smoke just one cigarette, you can be hooked again. You have to commit to the fact that you can never pick up a cigarette again as long as you live. After you go through those first 10 days, believe me, you won't ever want to do that again. So don't do it. Don't smoke another one, even years later.
I realize that I'm not done quitting. I have to maintain my quit every day. I have to deny the nicodemon every time he tries to come back into my life.
But every day it gets a little easier. Every day I feel a little better. Physically and about myself.
It's worth it. Good Luck.
Keith Hendrick kahen@icon-stl.net
Smoke free 1 Year 9 Months 4 Days 22 Hours 40435 cigarettes unsmoked. $3,032 saved.
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Post by judyb on Aug 26, 2004 11:01:38 GMT -5
Your addiction is not stronger than you. Though it may feel that way, it can only win if you let it. Like any weakness, it is not stronger than the soul or the force of will. Its strength only indicates the amount of effort that needs to be applied toward overcoming it. Try to realize, and truly realize, that what stands between you and a different life are matters of responsible choice. You are not at the mercy of your inadequacy. The intention that will empower you must come from a place within you that suggests that you are indeed able to make responsible choices, that you can make choices that empower you. Each time you resist temptation, you disengage the power of your addiction and increase your personal power more and more. When you feel the addictive attraction of nicotine, remember this: You stand between two worlds. The power is fully in your hands. As you choose to empower yourself, temptation will surface again and again. Each time you challenge it, you gain power and it loses power. Every time you are drawn to nicotine, challenge that energy. If you look upon each craving as an indication that your intention is not working, you are learning through fear and doubt. If you look upon each craving as an opportunity to release your addiction and to acquire power over it, you are learning through wisdom. The first time that you challenge your addiction, and the second, and the third, you may not feel that anything has been accomplished. Do you think that victory can be had so easily? As you hold on to your intention and resist again and again and again, you accumulate power and the addiction that you thought could not be conquered will lose its power over you. Understanding the dynamics behind your addiction is one thing. Actually making the emotional connection to discharge the need for it is another story. Your addiction is not insurmountable. In order to release your addiction, it is necessary to look deeply into yourself, to recognize your inadequacies and bring them into your consciousness to heal. It may be that your addiction has provided you one of the few genuine pleasures of your life. What is more important to you, your wholeness and your freedom, or the pleasures that you get from satisfying your addiction?
as3 - rian - 3/99
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Post by judyb on Aug 26, 2004 10:59:34 GMT -5
Bones on Unrecorded Date: Today has been a struggle in my battle without the cigarettes. After 1 week and 5 days, I still find myself automatically reaching for one without even thinking. As I rode in the car the other day, we passed by a house, no one I know, nothing that I know of connected me to that house, yet, I caught myself all of a sudden romanticising smoking one, holding it between my fingers, and pressing it to my lips to draw in a deep breathe.
I thought to myself "why do I want one right now at this particular moment?" It's not the nicotine I crave because at this point in my quit, I am still using the patch along with the wellbutrin, so, it has to be just the psychological aspect of the act. Was there something about that house that triggered a memory I was unaware of or had pushed back in my mind? Was it the color or the style that is somehow related to someone else's home that has caused me stress? I study my own thought patterns and try to analyze some of them so that I might understand the logic behind my habit.
As far back as I can remember, I have been around smokers beginning with both my parents. I used to sit and watch their actions of the hand to mouth, the suction, the exhale. Whatever was I thinking at that age that led me to begin the habit on my own? I hated the smell while living at home and tried to get them to quit to no avail and then, after losing my son at age 22, I lit up for the first time in my life. I don't understand how I could have managed to not smoke, nor be around smokers constantly from the time I was 18 till 22 and then, pick them up.
I remember during those 4 smoke free years the struggles with constant bouts of depression. I think now that it must have been withdrawal symptoms because I wasn't breathing the 2nd hand smoke any longer. Could I have been addicted by that smoke all my life even though it wasn't directly inhaled? If that is true, could that mean that rather than my saying I have smoked for 24 years, it could mean that number would be more like 43?
The everyday patterns are the hardest. No cig with coffee in the morning, none as I get ready for work, none in the car to work, none on break or after eating, none while on the computer or watching t.v.. Geez, I was forever with one in my hand. Now, it is not with me and I keep looking for it. I miss it terribly. I have trouble figuring out what to do when I drink coffee in the morning. I feel stupid just sitting there drinking the coffee. The other common times I would smoke are difficult also. Like one person said on the board, "what does a non smoker do after eating?" I have no idea because I have never really been without the nicotine in one form or another other than that 4 years.
I am proud of myself for taking this huge step to quit the habit. I am proud of myself each time I want a cigarette and don't get in the car and go buy a pack. I am proud of myself for all the times this last week and a half I have gotten up from a meal and begun a project other than smoking. I am proud of myself for having the courage to finally say "NO!". I will make it this time. I am tired of all the failed attempts to quit and somehow this time feels different. It feels right and it feels good and I feel strong.
One week, five days, 18 hours, 8 minutes and 12 seconds. 510 cigarettes not smoked, saving $62.50. Life saved: 1 day, 18 hours, 30 minutes.
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Post by judyb on Aug 26, 2004 10:58:43 GMT -5
Welcome, Jbabies and kudo's for the wonderful decision to reclaim your life from nicotine.
It's a nasty habit and a difficult one to break, but the results are worth it. Hold on, for the next week or two could be nail-biting, head-ripping off moments. But you WILL survive.
Explain to your hubby that he shouldn't take any thing personally, but to be open to your moods. Everything evens out over time.
Come here often, read and rant. Questions are always welcome and no question is "stupid". We all got where we are in our quits through knowledge of the insidious nicobeast....let us share it with you.
Lookin' forward to watching you grow in your quit!!!
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Post by judyb on Aug 26, 2004 11:02:18 GMT -5
(((((((( Dot ))))))))
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Post by judyb on Aug 26, 2004 11:03:46 GMT -5
From my extremely thick quit file, some great advice: In July of 1996, my father passed away and left me staring straight into the face of my own mortality. You see, he smoked a pack to 2 packs a day for 55 years. About five years before his death, he quit. At that point his weakened blood vessels had caused two annurisms, the second of which left him paralyzed. His second heart attack was the one that killed him. Dad was a very healthy guy otherwise. He exercised regularly and was always in great shape.
I'm not. I smoked 2-3 packs a day for 20 years. I began to think about missing my daughter's graduation and wedding. I realized I could barely breath by the time I had walked to my office from the car. Many of you know what I'm talking about. You have to stop and catch your breath when you get in the door. I was convinced I wouldn't live to see 50.
In December, I decided I was going to quit. I set a stop day. January 3rd of 1997. I didn't want to stop on New Years Eve because I know how tempting it is to smoke at the big party. I've tried that before and it never worked.
I got the gum, because I had heard about being able to measure your dose by chewing. I had also heard about the psycological advantage of tearing up your last pack of cigarettes and flushing them down the toilet.
At 3:00 am on January 3rd, I smoked my last cigarette. I stood over the toilet and tore up a little better than a pack of cigarettes. I didn't just tear them up, I attacked them. I blamed them for everything wrong in my life and I took those feelings out on that pack of cigarettes and watched them swirl down the basin when I flushed them away. It was like I was flushing away the problems in my life. (I wasn't of course, my problems still exist but it made me feel really good about what I was doing)
Afterward I sat down and cried for a few minutes and then I went to bed.
The next morning I woke up and immediately thought of my cigarettes. I grabbed my gum and started chewing. That first day was tough. The second was worse. No one I knew believed I could quit but they were all very supportive of my attempt. My wife got rid of all the ashtrays, lighters, matches and other smoking material in the house.
By day 4, I couldn't stand the gum anymore. My jaws were tired from chewing all the time. It really does taste terrible. I switched to regular Wrigley's gum. That lasted about 3 days. Finally I gave up the gum altogether and went cold turkey. Let me tell you, those first 10 days sucked. They were the worst experience of my life. I wanted a cigarette all the time. There was never a moment when I didn't want one. Then things gradually started getting better. This NG helped me a lot. I would sit and read the posts and cry. I felt all the same things you people are feeling. I didn't post. I just needed to know that other people went through the same things I did and made it. I needed their suggestions for getting through tough times. It helped a great deal.
Some of the worst things about quiting: 1 The first 10 days are pure hell. (but it gets better) 2 After about 3 months the little hairs in your throat start growing back and it itches. You cough as bad or worse than you did when you smoked. It makes you feel like "if I'm gonna cough this bad I might as well smoke." (But it goes away.) 3 When you've been working with your hands, where you can't smoke. You complete the job and you reach for a cigarette. You don't realize it but you feel that cigarette is like a reward. When its not there, you're VERY disappointed. Its depressing. (But that goes away too.) 4 You really wonder when the day will come when you will go a whole day without thinking of having a cigarette. (For me it was some time during my second year.) 5 You still want one every once in a while, no matter how long its been. The cravings just come further and further apart.
I mention all this not to frighten you but so that you can prepare yourself for it.
As time went by, I realized why the non-smokers are so offended.
The first thing I noticed was that people who smoke stink. I mean really, we smell. As my sense of smell returned, I would have people walk into my office who smoked and I could tell the minute they walked in the door. The odor of the smoke permeates their clothes and body. That helped. Then I started to be bothered by smoke when I was eating. Not at first. In fact it was several months. But now it bothers me. Not terribly. I decided I would not become one of these fanatical anti-smokers when I quit and I haven't. I no longer allow it in my house or car because I don't like the smell. But I don't mind sitting with people who smoke in a meeting, or being in a smoke filled bar. In fact, during the first few weeks of my quit, I would hang around smokers because the second hand smoke would seem to satisfy my cravings.
That was one of the things that surprised me. It has never bothered me to drink around people who smoke. It never made me crave a cigarette (even the first time on day 4) and it has never bothered me to have a beer with a smoker.
To sum it up though it has definitely been worth while. I can breath again, my blood pressure is way down, I don't cough all the time, I can walk to the office from my car without gasping and I think I'm gonna live another twenty years at least. (I still need to lose some weight and I smoked a long time but I'm getting better.) I'm happier. People don't avoid me at parties or make me stand outside their house to smoke. I got a promotion I don't know if I would have gotten if I still smoked. And most of all, the people who never thought I would quit, gained a tremendous amoumt of respect for me. Especially, the smokers who know how tough it is.
To give a new quitter some advice, here's what helped me. It won't necessarily work for everyone.
1 You can't quit for anybody but yourself. If you're quitting for your wife or your girlfriend or whomever, forget it. Nicorette and Nicoderm are expensive. Save yourself some money and quit when YOU'RE ready. It doesn't work unless you really want to quit.
2 Get some support. Use this NG. Get your wife and coworkers to help. Call a friend who has quit. Talk to somebody.
3 Make yourself a quit list. Write down every reason you have for stopping. It helps to run through them once in a while.
4 Don't smoke your last cigarette. Tear them up and flush them. It's a tremendous psycological advantage.
5 If you're really tempted to the point of giving in, go sit with some folks who smoke. Breath the second hand smoke. Enjoy it. BUT DON'T PUT ONE IN YOUR MOUTH.
6 This one is the most important. You have to realize that you have an addiction to nicotine that lasts a lifetime. An alcoholic doesn't stop being an alcoholic when he's not drinking. A heroin user can't have "an occassional fix." When you flush that last cigarette, you must realize that when you smoke just one cigarette, you can be hooked again. You have to commit to the fact that you can never pick up a cigarette again as long as you live. After you go through those first 10 days, believe me, you won't ever want to do that again. So don't do it. Don't smoke another one, even years later.
I realize that I'm not done quitting. I have to maintain my quit every day. I have to deny the nicodemon every time he tries to come back into my life.
But every day it gets a little easier. Every day I feel a little better. Physically and about myself.
It's worth it. Good Luck.
Keith Hendrick kahen@icon-stl.net
Smoke free 1 Year 9 Months 4 Days 22 Hours 40435 cigarettes unsmoked. $3,032 saved.
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Post by judyb on Aug 26, 2004 11:01:38 GMT -5
Your addiction is not stronger than you. Though it may feel that way, it can only win if you let it. Like any weakness, it is not stronger than the soul or the force of will. Its strength only indicates the amount of effort that needs to be applied toward overcoming it. Try to realize, and truly realize, that what stands between you and a different life are matters of responsible choice. You are not at the mercy of your inadequacy. The intention that will empower you must come from a place within you that suggests that you are indeed able to make responsible choices, that you can make choices that empower you. Each time you resist temptation, you disengage the power of your addiction and increase your personal power more and more. When you feel the addictive attraction of nicotine, remember this: You stand between two worlds. The power is fully in your hands. As you choose to empower yourself, temptation will surface again and again. Each time you challenge it, you gain power and it loses power. Every time you are drawn to nicotine, challenge that energy. If you look upon each craving as an indication that your intention is not working, you are learning through fear and doubt. If you look upon each craving as an opportunity to release your addiction and to acquire power over it, you are learning through wisdom. The first time that you challenge your addiction, and the second, and the third, you may not feel that anything has been accomplished. Do you think that victory can be had so easily? As you hold on to your intention and resist again and again and again, you accumulate power and the addiction that you thought could not be conquered will lose its power over you. Understanding the dynamics behind your addiction is one thing. Actually making the emotional connection to discharge the need for it is another story. Your addiction is not insurmountable. In order to release your addiction, it is necessary to look deeply into yourself, to recognize your inadequacies and bring them into your consciousness to heal. It may be that your addiction has provided you one of the few genuine pleasures of your life. What is more important to you, your wholeness and your freedom, or the pleasures that you get from satisfying your addiction?
as3 - rian - 3/99
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Post by judyb on Aug 26, 2004 10:59:34 GMT -5
Bones on Unrecorded Date: Today has been a struggle in my battle without the cigarettes. After 1 week and 5 days, I still find myself automatically reaching for one without even thinking. As I rode in the car the other day, we passed by a house, no one I know, nothing that I know of connected me to that house, yet, I caught myself all of a sudden romanticising smoking one, holding it between my fingers, and pressing it to my lips to draw in a deep breathe.
I thought to myself "why do I want one right now at this particular moment?" It's not the nicotine I crave because at this point in my quit, I am still using the patch along with the wellbutrin, so, it has to be just the psychological aspect of the act. Was there something about that house that triggered a memory I was unaware of or had pushed back in my mind? Was it the color or the style that is somehow related to someone else's home that has caused me stress? I study my own thought patterns and try to analyze some of them so that I might understand the logic behind my habit.
As far back as I can remember, I have been around smokers beginning with both my parents. I used to sit and watch their actions of the hand to mouth, the suction, the exhale. Whatever was I thinking at that age that led me to begin the habit on my own? I hated the smell while living at home and tried to get them to quit to no avail and then, after losing my son at age 22, I lit up for the first time in my life. I don't understand how I could have managed to not smoke, nor be around smokers constantly from the time I was 18 till 22 and then, pick them up.
I remember during those 4 smoke free years the struggles with constant bouts of depression. I think now that it must have been withdrawal symptoms because I wasn't breathing the 2nd hand smoke any longer. Could I have been addicted by that smoke all my life even though it wasn't directly inhaled? If that is true, could that mean that rather than my saying I have smoked for 24 years, it could mean that number would be more like 43?
The everyday patterns are the hardest. No cig with coffee in the morning, none as I get ready for work, none in the car to work, none on break or after eating, none while on the computer or watching t.v.. Geez, I was forever with one in my hand. Now, it is not with me and I keep looking for it. I miss it terribly. I have trouble figuring out what to do when I drink coffee in the morning. I feel stupid just sitting there drinking the coffee. The other common times I would smoke are difficult also. Like one person said on the board, "what does a non smoker do after eating?" I have no idea because I have never really been without the nicotine in one form or another other than that 4 years.
I am proud of myself for taking this huge step to quit the habit. I am proud of myself each time I want a cigarette and don't get in the car and go buy a pack. I am proud of myself for all the times this last week and a half I have gotten up from a meal and begun a project other than smoking. I am proud of myself for having the courage to finally say "NO!". I will make it this time. I am tired of all the failed attempts to quit and somehow this time feels different. It feels right and it feels good and I feel strong.
One week, five days, 18 hours, 8 minutes and 12 seconds. 510 cigarettes not smoked, saving $62.50. Life saved: 1 day, 18 hours, 30 minutes.
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Post by judyb on Aug 26, 2004 10:58:43 GMT -5
Welcome, Jbabies and kudo's for the wonderful decision to reclaim your life from nicotine.
It's a nasty habit and a difficult one to break, but the results are worth it. Hold on, for the next week or two could be nail-biting, head-ripping off moments. But you WILL survive.
Explain to your hubby that he shouldn't take any thing personally, but to be open to your moods. Everything evens out over time.
Come here often, read and rant. Questions are always welcome and no question is "stupid". We all got where we are in our quits through knowledge of the insidious nicobeast....let us share it with you.
Lookin' forward to watching you grow in your quit!!!
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Post by judyb on Aug 23, 2004 8:21:19 GMT -5
Checking in from a most tropical place!!! It's so humid my eyeglasses fog up when I step outside.
Glad I don't have to go out there to smoke!!!
6 years, 1 month, 2 days, 20 hours, 35 minutes and 16 seconds. 77,905 cigarettes not smoked, saving $9,738.13. Life saved: 38 weeks, 4 days, 12 hours, 5 minutes.
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Dot?
Aug 26, 2004 11:02:18 GMT -5
Post by judyb on Aug 26, 2004 11:02:18 GMT -5
(((((((( Dot ))))))))
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Post by judyb on Aug 23, 2004 10:59:45 GMT -5
Welcome Jack! You've come to a great place for support and information.........as well as inspiration.
Read and post, ask questions. Quitting IS do-able!!!
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Post by judyb on Aug 23, 2004 11:01:16 GMT -5
Welcome, Jessica! Glad you're looking to beat the nicotine beast. It's the best thing you can do for yourself and your loved ones.
We're here for you!
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